Sex and back pain: advice for your couple

Le back pain influences mood and well-being. It can become a hindrance to various aspects of life including sex life. You feel that your couple life is affected by the lumbago ? Discover in this article, advice to help better manage the situation

Understanding back pain

According to WHO statistics, around 80% of the world's population suffers from back pain. Back pain generally corresponds to pain in the spine and related structures such as muscles or nerves.

Lower back pain is a common example of back pain. It affects at least 4 out of 5 people. It is localized pain in the lower back. In this type of back pain, the pain can sometimes radiate to the buttocks and lower limbs.

As a reminder, the causes of back pain are diverse. Depending on their cause, treatment may vary. It is possible that they are secondary to a disease (symptomatic low back pain) or that they appear on their own (low back pain alone or mechanical). In any case, low back pain can have an influence on sexuality.

Sexuality and low back pain

Back pain: accentuated by sexual intercourse?

The back, especially in the lumbar part, is particularly stressed during sexual intercourse. Back and forth movements and certain sexual positions could further aggravate the ailments. It is therefore possible to feel pain during or after the act.

Low back pain and its consequences on sex life

Making love can become a nightmare when you suffer from low back pain. Moreover, many people with low back pain prefer to avoid certain sexual practices by focusing on abstinence. This could further increase the frustration and tension between the partners. There are even couples who separate for this reason.

The problem is not just pain restrictions. Low back pain also negatively affects:

• libido ;
• desire ;
• excitement;
• the quality of orgasm which is supposed to be the culmination of sexual pleasure.

On the one hand, the discomfort can be explained by the fear that the pain will get worse. On the other hand, the consequences of low back pain on psychology also have something to do with it. A person who suffers from chronic pain tends to become depressed, anxious, irritable and above all hypervigilant to pain.

In addition, low back pain treatments are not without side effects either. For example, some painkillers (of the opiate or tramadol type) affect libido and decrease sexual performance. These sexual dysfunctions are often responsible for disturbances in the life of a couple.

Advice for fully enjoying your sexuality despite back pain

It is entirely possible to have a fulfilling sex life despite lower back pain. Here are our tips.

 

Take the right position

To suffer less during the sexual act, it is advisable to optimize the position. This subject has even been the subject of scientific studies. And it seems that certain sexual positions would make it possible to have less back pain. However, it depends on each person's situation.

In general, the principle is to understand your back pain: in which positions and movements do you have the most pain? Leaning forward or leaning back? You will therefore adapt your position accordingly.

For men

If forward bending is painful, the missionary position is recommended. The woman lies on her back and the man on top. Be careful, however, that the woman's legs do not cling to the man's back at the risk of increasing the constraints.

On the other hand, that of the spoon is to be avoided. This position requires a slight bending of the man to stick to his partner, both lying on the side. The position of the doggy style, which is close to the spoon, is also not recommended.

If the pains appear when the man leans back: it is necessary to privilege the position of the spoon. It would be wise to avoid large movements. It is best to let the woman do the large hip movements to minimize the work and strain on the spine.

For women

If it is the forward bend that accentuates the back pain, the doggy style and the spoon are recommended.

On the other hand, if it is the extension that is painful, it is better to opt for the missionary. In this case, the support for the woman's back will be provided by the bed or the floor. Doggy style, on the other hand, is prohibited.

In short, these are only suggestions that can be effective, but it's up to you to find the positions that make you feel comfortable. You can, for example, try to put less strain on your spine. Instead, use other parts of your body: lean on your elbows, move your knees, your thighs or your pelvis… In any case, the position of the doggy style is not recommended.

Choose the right treatments

Adjusting the sexual position is effective, but it is not a long-term solution. To be able to make love as you wish, it is necessary to treat the background of the disease. To do this, you can consult a doctor, an osteopath, a physiotherapist or an acupuncturist. It is best to avoid treatments that are harmful to sexual capacity as much as possible.

Make love to relieve back pain

On the other hand, sexual intercourse causes the release of hormones that relieve pain and lower back pain in general. These are oxytocin and endorphin. These hormones have an effect:

• of relaxation ;
• of well-being ;
• on the quality of sleep;
• and muscle relaxation.

That is why sex may benefit lower back pain.

Sex isn't fun when you have back pain. Find a compromise with your partner to find the position that hurts the least. Consult a specialist to permanently treat the problem before it becomes serious. In short, do not let low back pain spoil the pleasure of sex.

References

https://www.reflexosteo.com/blog-sante-bien-etre/mal-au-dos-et-sexe-quelles-solutions-330

https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S1158136018301257